National Conference

The Bangalore chapter of Sudatta, the Adoption Families' Support Group, conducted a national conference on 14th and 15th November, to celebrate Adoption Awareness month in November 2009. The conference on 'Empowering Adoptive Families' was well attended by over a hundred participants, including 87 adults and 42 children.

Day 1 of the conference -

The conference began with Secretary Brindha welcoming the participants to the conference. President Dr. Saraswati Srinath told us how we celebrate November as Adoption Awareness Month, especially the week 14th November to 20th November as Adoption Awareness Week. Vice President Dr. Rajendra Bandi gave us the programme agenda.

Then we had talks on various topics by several distinguished speakers and experts throughout the day.

The first speaker, Dr. Shobha Srinath, delivering the Keynote address on 'Perspectives on Adoptive Parenting' told us how adoption is just another angle of parenting because parents have to be good whether they have adopted or otherwise. She spoke of different dimensions of parenting and elucidated certain qualities noted in those who have been 'good' parents.

The second part of the forenoon had a session each for parents with children under 10 years and those with older children.

For parents with children older than 10 years, Ms. Saras Bhaskar spoke on 'Challenges in Parenting Pre Teens and Teens'. She explained how parenting is both an art and a science - art because parenting is creative and needs skills, and science because parenting can be measured as it is quantifiable.

Good parents are bad parents, if they are not responsible. Truly good parents are responsible parents, is what Ms. Saras Bhaskar said.

Parents with children under 10 years, had a session by Ms. Rukmini Ramachandran, who focused on the importance of power of language and power of movement for the complete development of the child, as in the Montessorie system of education. With respect to adoption, she said adoptive parents can tend to be quite protective and therefore sensitive about letting the child explore the powers of language and movement.

The afternoon session, common to all parents, had Dr. Vinita Bhargava, speaking on 'Understanding your child means Understanding yourself better'. Dr. Bhargava explained how it is one thing reading up on adoption and totally another actually parenting adopted children. Her inputs on how to relate to the child at different age levels, with illustrations and humorous anecdotes from her own life, were very valuable.

The last session for the day, was a very thought-provoking one, with Raj Bandi sharing the various facts and figures related to Sudatta from the time of its inception, and asking the gathering to brainstorm on what we want Sudatta to be 10 years hence. The participants were divided into groups and provided with chart paper and pens to put down their ideas on how we would achieve what we want Sudatta to be in 2020.

The evening had lots of games, music and dance to provide a refreshing break after the day long sessions and to enhance bonding amongst the participants.

Day 2 of the conference -

In the first sesson, Dr. Meena Jain, speaking on 'Education and Adoption' said educational difficulties are not specific to adoption although they can come up. She focused on the role of positive reinforcement to the child in order to keep her/ his self-esteem intact, to enhance the performance - academic and otherwise - of the child. She also touched upon career options for children with learning difficulties, implying focus on non-academic strengths of the child.

In the next session, we had Dr. Ali Khwaja, speaking on 'Role of siblings in Adoptive families'. He said having siblings teaches a lot of lessons of life to the child, irrespective of biological or adopted. Dr. Khwaja advised those who have a single child, to have 'part-time' siblings, meaning a boy or a girl who can go on family outings, stay over at home, do things together with the family just like a sibling, for the child to learn to share, to learn to lose / win in fights and so on.

The third session was a panel discussion on the issue of search, moderated byDr. Margaret Nakra, with a parent, an adoptee, an expert and an agency head, all exchanging different aspects of search in an interactive session.

The last session had a wonderful group of young adult adoptees, sharing their experiences and their perspectives on parenting. The interactions provided a lot of learning for the parents and food for thought.

On both the days, while parents were in the sessions, children were taken care of with craft sessions, theatre workshops and other age-relevant activities.

All in all, the conference was highly appreciated by all the participants.